I do not like green eggs and ham

Today was Cat in the Hat day at Kayleigh's school. It's the day when all the first graders gather in the gym to celebrate the birthday of Dr. Seuss and each one of them gets a tall, striped Cat in the Hat hat donated by a local restaurant. This wonderful restaurant also cooks up vats of wonderful green scrambled eggs and ham (pink, not green). Let's start this off by saying that I DO NOT like eggs, let alone green eggs and I'm not a huge fan of ham either. So I'm sitting at the table with about 10 pint sized kids in their tall hats and they're all excited about this whole experience. One child noticed that I was not touching my green eggs and ham and he said "why aren't you eating your breakfast?" I replied "I do not like green eggs and ham." The he said "would you eat them in a house? Would you eat them with a mouse?" What a little smart ass, who taught that kid to read? So I said "no, I would not eat them in a house or with a mouse. I do not like green eggs and ham...Corbin!" Then another smarty pants said "would you eat them in a box with a fox in sox?" I wanted to thumb my nose at her and tell her that she was in the wrong story dumb, dumb! But I said "I will not eat them in a box with a fox in sox, I will not eat them here or there, I will not eat them ANYWHERE!" At that point Kayleigh's teacher (whome I adore to no end and would do anything for) walks up to me and said in a very gentle, I'm working my best patience here, voice "You know Mrs. Lewis; we encourage all the children to at least try their food and perhaps if you ate some of yours it would encourage the children to eat theirs." WHAT????!!!! I don't wanna eat those nasty things! (that was what was in my head, but Kayleigh and her minions were watching and I had to do as I was told). For the first time in over 20 years, eggs passed my lips today! Not only were they eggs, but they were green, nasty looking, icky eggs!! I thought I was gonna puke, but I smiled and said "mmmm, yes, this is a great reminder of WHY I don't like eggs...they taste just like EGGS!" All the kids laughed and made fun of me because I got busted by the teacher . I didn't even get my own darn hat! So now I don't have to worry about the whole Green Eggs and ham issue again until Mia starts first grade in the year 2011. There is a reason why that story is a child's fiction story, green eggs and ham are sick to look at, who wants to eat that mess? After the fabulous breakfast I was able to exact my revenge on the children in Kayleigh's class by painting their hands red for the February craft, muwaahahahahahahhaaha.